Dear Amy: “Excellent,” he said he was in his 50s. He wants to know how to contact women and see if they are available or if he should stop searching.
My young but smart cousin and I once talked about meeting women. I asked him what he should do to see a woman. His suggestion is, “Don’t look!”
He said that people can feel when someone feels desperate, which may be a big change. He also said that he was myself and had entertaining conversations with people, not just hoping to meet a woman. This technique allows one’s true face to shine, instead of the anxious “I must meet someone”
Once the miracle has a wonderful conversation in a relaxed atmosphere, after leaving, just ask him if he can continue to drink coffee to continue the conversation.
If the woman refuses because she was asked to speak up, he should not consider it over. She may have connections in her network and know him well.
Two months after speaking with my cousin, my wife, who is about to become a wife, came into my life.
Dear married person: I personally share and follow your cousin’s advice.
However, he didn’t mean to stop watching completely, but to relax and watch in another way. Connecting with people in a friendly and open attitude can enhance friendship (or more) and can easily illuminate the lives of others.
Dear Amy: For “Wondering”, he is a single man in his 50s and does not know how to date. I suggest volunteering to donate to charities or organizations that are meaningful to him.
I met my husband in this way 42 years ago. The beginning of his conversation: “What inspired you to volunteer here?”
My response opened up a world of common interests, which evolved into a marriage of respect, love and happiness.
—Work for us
Dear staff: Volunteering is a great way to achieve multiple goals: do a good job and meet other kind people.
I focus on the first question your husband has for you. This is an ideal example of an open-ended question, designed to inspire thoughtful answers.
Dear Amy: “M” has always been an aspiring magazine administrator and is seeking advice. I think she might be interested in the method I used many years ago.
One thing that makes me write regularly is my daily e-mail exchanges with friends.
At the beginning of our friendship, this friend started writing news emails to me, and we both developed the habit of writing to each other every day.
I copied and saved our email, and kept the file from 2004!
We usually write about what happens to us every day, and frankly, many of them are not very deep or exciting things. However, sometimes they are useful when I need to remember the date of a major event.
The biggest advantage of this is that my friends and I have become very close, and each of us wants to read each other’s emails when we start the day.
Obviously, “M” needs to find someone who is willing to write letters back and forth with her every day, but she may want to find out among her friends and family to see if anyone is interested.
In addition, she may still want to keep a blank diary on the bedside table so that she can separate her deeper and more private inner thoughts from the writing of her email pen pal.
—Irene, located in Colchester, Connecticut
Dear Irene: In the process of recording your own personal history and deepening your friendship, this is a wonderful and rich way!
During a pandemic, in many ways it is the best time to find new letters.
I am inspired and hope that others can also be inspired and seek ordinary pen pals.
Dear Amy: Thank you for your “disgusting” answer. This black man often suffers from racial discrimination in his warehouse workplace.
To learn that people still have to face this insult, I feel very sick.
Dear shock: Tony Morrison said in my answer: “The job of racism is to silence you and distract you.”
Many readers are inspired to respond, and frankly, some of the responses are not only dismissive, but also completely racist.
We have a lot of work to do.
You can email it to Amy Dickinson email@example.com Or send a letter to Ask Amy, PO Box 194, Freeville, New York 13068